


You're Late, Father

by gyeoulbarami



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Asano Gakuhou's Bad Parenting, Asano Gakushuu-centric, Depressed Asano Gakushuu, Domestic Violence, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:40:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29104947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gyeoulbarami/pseuds/gyeoulbarami
Summary: Asano Gakushuu attempted suicide but somehow, he survived. His father, Asano Gakuhou realized that it was all his mistakes that made his son suicidal. He tried to reconcile with his son but Gakushuu always keep a distance from Gakuhou.
Relationships: Asano Gakuhou & Asano Gakushuu
Kudos: 70





	You're Late, Father

**Author's Note:**

> I'm back with another angst ff for the Asanos! I've been thinking what will happen if Gakushuu tried to end his life but he failed. Gakuhou wants to be a good father after realizing he almost lost Gakushuu but it's not easy to erase those 10 years of hell.
> 
> Happy reading!

“Gakushuu, you are home!”

“Gakushuu, I made your favourite dish! Let’s eat together!”

“Hey, Son, you need help?”

“Gakushuu….!”

“Gakushuu!”

_Oh my. This old man is hurting my head so much._

* * *

It’s been weeks since the principal starting to act weird. Well, it’s not like he’s running all around the school without his pants. He became super friendly. Especially towards Asano Gakushuu, his one and only son. It is really weird because everybody knows that they’re not in a good relationship although they lived in the same roof and went to the same school every morning.

Gakushuu stared at this father with a hatred look when the older man greeted him at the hallway. “Don’t talk to me.” And then he walked away with Ren trying to stop him from behind.

“Hey, Asano! Shouldn’t you at least greet him back?”

“Shut up. Did I asked you to follow me?”

Ren tightened his lips, didn’t have any guts to reply.

Gakuhou sighed seeing his son walked away without saying anything. He headed back to his office, nodded to the students’ greeting.

Ren was still following Gakushuu, making the other boy irritated. “Why the fuck are you following me?!”

“Well, uh, it’s a coincidence that I’m heading to the same way as you are.”

Those violet eyes grew darker. “Sakakibara Ren, stop the nonsense.”

“Asano…. the thing is….”

“It’s true that 3 weeks ago I tried to committed suicide. But it doesn’t mean I will try to kill myself every time I’m alone.”

Ren gulped; the word kill made him flinched. He didn’t know what to respond. So, he just nodded his head. “Okay, I got it. But why are you heading to the rooftop?”

“I wanna eat there.”

Good. Now Ren wouldn’t believe him. He usually doesn’t eat his lunch at the rooftop. But today Gakushuu want to eat there. Seeing the blue sky while enjoying wind blowing his hair sounds relaxing.

Since now everyone knows that he’s suicidal, Ren must be thinking Gakushuu wanted to jump from the rooftop.

“I’m not gonna jump, Idiot.”

“Oh, okay. That’s great!”

“Yeah. Now leave me alone.”

Gakushuu opened the door and now he could see Tokyo’s skyscraper from up there. There is no bench there, so he decided to sit somewhere.

The boy didn’t eat his lunch immediately. He just sat there silently. A faint sound of traffic can be heard, besides that there was nothing else except the sound of wind blowing.

He folded his legs until they touched his chest before hugging them tightly. Gakushuu put his chin on his knee. The wind blowed a bit harder this time, making his forehead exposed from his bangs.

Three weeks ago, to be precise after the announcement of their final exam rankings, Asano Gakuhou hit him in front of all of his 3-A classmates. The slap that he got just then was enough to make Gakushuu’s head dizzy and his back hurt from hitting the classroom wall. Apparently slapping him didn’t calm his father’s anger. Gakuhou continued to hit his son when they are home. That was the worse treatment Gakushuu got from his father in his whole life. Gakuhou hit Gakushuu like he already lost his mind.

Gakushuu screamed loudly, hoping that one of their servants will hear him and help him to get away from his father. His eyes stared at his father with so much horror in them. Gakushuu succeeded to kick Gakuhou’s stomach then run away. He desperately run from the house.

The older people at the street looking at him curiously, wanted to know what happened to the poor boy with bruises can be seen almost on his whole body. After making sure that his father wasn’t following him, Gakushuu slowed down his pace. He didn’t know where to go. Obviously, he couldn’t go to Ren’s. Ren’s parents are home, they will ask questions and Gakushuu didn’t feel like he wanted to explain those bruises at all.

The strawberry blonde boy kept walking. Once in a while he would rub his eyes, freeing his sight from tears. He didn’t know why on earth he’s crying. Maybe because of the wounds? Well, that might be true. Those wounds began to hurt as hell.

He was still wearing his uniform, minus his jacket. Gakushuu haven’t eaten his dinner yet, that explains why his stomach was growling. Suddenly he missed his mother so much. When she was still alive, she wouldn’t let him starving. She would cook his favourite meal, sat with him and listened to him babbling anything. His eyes felt warm and more tears flowing down his bruised cheek.

Before he could realize where his feet were taking him to, Gakushuu heard the sound of water flowing. He snapped back from his thought and realized he was at a bridge. He got goosebumps. This is the bridge where Ikeda jumped to end his life. The same bridge that his father had always avoided. A tragic place that made his life never the same again.

Actually, Gakushuu’s life wasn’t the same anymore after his mother’s death. They said it was an incurable disease. Gakushuu didn’t recall seeing his mother in pain. She always smiled at him, patted his head while saying that she loves him very much. She’s a woman that always tried to make Gakushuu only see the beauty of this world, not the rotten part.

All of sudden his mother never wakes up again. There are no more good morning kisses, eating with Mom or snuggling before sleep. Gakushuu was only 4. After that Gakuhou raised him as a single father. Gakushuu would cry sometimes, looking for his mother but Gakuhou never failed to ease his pain and took him into his arms.

The next year, he lost his father. One day his father came home with a dark expression on his face. Gakushuu greeted him cheerfully while asking for a hug but Gakuhou pushed him away without saying anything. After that, his once loving father is gone. And Gakushuu had to learn to live with a monster called Principal.

“ _You_ ,” his hoarse voice said. “It’s all because of you. If you didn’t jump from this fucking bridge that day, I would be living a different life.” Gakushuu gripped the bridge’s cold metal firmly.

That night’s weather was pretty cold. Gakushuu shivered a little. He felt lonely. It was true that he has the other virtuosos but Gakushuu never considered them as friends. He is raised to see everything, _everyone_ as competitor. His life was just about competition. No one ever taught him to make friends, to be friendly with others.

His sniffling quickly became uncontrollably sobs. The boy kept shedding tears no matter how hard he tried to stop sobbing.

“Mom,” he cried. “You said you love me. You said you will always be by my side. Where are you? Why did you leave me with him?” Gakushuu screamed to the water below him.

He bended his body so his forehead touched the cold metal. Gakushuu bit his lower lip. “I don’t know what did I do in my previous life. Did I commit an unforgiveable sin? Why…. why I have to live like this now?”

“He said he’ll protect me,” he whispered. “Father said it on Mom’s funeral. He made a promise with me. But why now he’s the one who beat me to my death?”

A laughed echoed. Gakushuu laughed very hard. “I refused to die on his hands. It’s my life. I’ll be the one who decide where and when my life will end.”

Gakushuu looked down to the dark water. “No one cares about me though. If I’m gone, my death will never hurt nobody.” He let out a low murmured.

That was how Asano Gakushuu decided to end his life. But heaven didn’t let the boy die that fast. He survived. Someone saw him jumped. The old man called an ambulance and went to look for Gakushuu’s body, hoping the younger man is still breathing.

* * *

Door closed behind his back. “I’m home.” No one answered his greeting. It was the same big, lonely house that was once a home for him. Gakushuu sighed and headed to his bedroom.

When Gakuhou came home, he saw his son was making dinner. “Gakushuu!”

Gakushuu snorted. He ignored his father.

Gakuhou began to ask Gakushuu about his day, how was school and things about his friends. It was irritating for Gakushuu to hear his father keep talking.

“Can you please don’t call me with that name?”

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“That _name_.”

His father didn’t seem to get what was Gakushuu referring to. Gakushuu groaned. “Just call me like you always do.”

Gakuhou pulled one of their dining chairs and sat on it, looking at his son’s back. “But that’s your name.”

“Nobody calls me with that name for the last decade. I’m not familiar with it.”

Seems like Gakuhou didn’t have any topic to be discussed with Gakushuu so they fell into silence until Gakushuu finished cooking.

“You know you don’t have to cook. I can cook your favourite meal for tomorrow’s dinner.”

“You don’t have to. It’s only cooking. I’m really capable of doing it by myself.”

“That’s not the case. I’m your father- “

Gakushuu nearly slammed his fork. “What? Father? In these past 10 years, name one thing that you’ve done for me as a father!”

“I teach you a lot of things,” Gakuhou retorted. “I provide you the best education that many other kids want it so much. I give you a lot more pocket money than parents usually give their 15 years old. I’ve done so many things for you as your father.”

That wasn’t Gakushuu meant. After all, his father is still the same. How can he expect his father to come back to his old self even if it was just a little hope of his?

“What kind of father called his own son with his last name instead of his given name?” Gakushuu smirked. “Admit it, Father. You are not that great as a father.”

Gakuhou was about to talk but Gakushuu cut him off. “Right. This is how we communicate, Father. Having a nice talk doesn’t suit us at all.”

“Gakushuu.” Gakuhou stared at him. “I’m trying to be a better parent for you. Can you please appreciate my effort?”

“Have you ever appreciated my effort?”

Gakuhou felt like someone punch his stomach. He knew that all along he has wronged Gakushuu. But still, his ego was still too big to admit his wrong doings.

“Great. You already know the answer. I’ll be doing the exact thing just like you always treat me.” Gakushuu picked his fork again and continue eating his dinner.

They ate in silence, just like they always do. Gakuhou finished his dinner first. He watched Gakushuu as the boy finished his dinner and found his father staring at him.

“Do you wanna pick a fight with me or what?” the boy narrowed his eyes.

“I just realize that you have grown so much.”

“Stop this nonsense. It sounds like you haven’t seen me for years.”

“I already finished my dinner. Please excuse me.” Gakushuu turned his back. He headed back to his room.

Gakuhou didn’t stop him this time.

Gakushuu’s footsteps were getting away from the quiet dining table.

“I’m sorry.”

The younger man was stunned to hear the words that slid from his father’s lips. But Gakushuu didn’t turn around.

“I’m sorry for what I’ve done to you. I…. I should not treat you like that. I want you to grow up to be a strong person so you won’t……”

“So I won’t ended up like _him_.”

Gakuhou swallowed hard. Hearing Gakushuu say his interrupted sentence made his chest feel heavy. He nodded.

“But I was wrong. I use the wrong method. I almost lose you.”

“Father,” Gakushuu turned around. “You are neglecting me. Others must have thought Ikeda is your son and I’m the stranger.”

That name made his old scar bleed again. A wound that would never heal. Gakushuu almost made a new wound on Gakuhou.

“Do you know that I always call you as _Dad_ in my mind? You forbid me to call you that. But I still see _you_ as my father. Have you ever thought of me? I bet no. You always see _me_ as your pupil, not your son.” Gakushuu tried so hard to hold back his tears.

“You broke your promise.”

Gakuhou frowned. Promise? What kind of promise? Why he didn’t remember anything?

“What promise?”

Gakushuu looked at Gakuhou in disappointment. There was pain radiating from the look in his eyes. 

“You don’t remember.” Not a question, but more like an accusation.

“I don’t remember owing you a promise.”

“That explains everything.” A faint smile crossed Gakushuu’s lips. “Good night, Father.”

No. This can’t end here. Gakuhou tried to rack his brain, remembering what kind of promise he made with his son.

When Gakushuu was about to open the door to his room, Gakuhou remembered that promise. His heart sank as he realized what he had forgotten.

“Gakushuu, wait!” He called out his son.

Gakushuu looked at his father with an uninterested gaze.

_“Asano Gakushuu, I promise I will protect you from every harm as long as I’m still breathing. I will never let anyone hurt you.”_

A promise that Gakuhou forgot for a long time. The promise that he broke two years after he promised.

“I remember.”

Gakushuu's hands clenched into fists. “Good for you.”

“Son, I’m sorry. I’ve been a terrible parent.”

“That’s great.” Gakushuu stared at his father blankly. “Now live with that guilt for the rest of your life. Your son is dead. I’m just an empty shell of someone that used to be your son.”

Gakushuu’s words hit Gakuhou really hard. Seeing Gakushuu's blank stare made Gakuhou's heart ache. He had hurt the boy too much.

“You are late, Father. I’m gone before you even realize it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading until the end! I hope you guys are enjoying Gakuhoe's guilt 😆
> 
> Feel free to leave comments or suggestions for me! I would love to read it. Have a nice day!


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